After logging in a dozen hours in a typical work day, 32-year-old Wei Ping often drops by the Bailingtan Bar in downtown Beijing in the early evening.

He does not come to the bar simply to relax, but for something more important: He's looking for the love of his life.

Wei is part of a new generation of young Chinese who are looking for love with higher expectations and little free time. And many times, they find it's not so easy.

Wei is the manager of a Beijing-based IT company. Busy with work, Wei said he had few chances to meet people outside his company. Although his parents and friends have arranged several dates, Wei said he had not met "Ms Right."

"Sometimes I feel confused," Wei said. "Even young women with a higher educational background and a good job have too high expectations of men higher incomes, romance and more."

The Bailingtan Bar distinguishes itself from numerous bars in Beijing for its special services for single men and women aged between 27 to 38.

Visitors to the bar like Wei can exchange personal information with each other free of charge and participate in various entertainment games arranged by the bar.

Currently, 3,000 people have registered their personal information at the bar, hoping to find their soul mates, said owner Li Jingming. The bar has so far helped several dozen couples tie the knot, Li said.

New changes

Great changes have taken place in China over the past five decades, especially since the country adopted a reform and opening-up policy in 1978.

In the early 20th century, arranged marriages were the norm, and parents often made the decisions for their children, with the advice of a matchmaker.

It was still common for young people to look for future spouses through go-betweens 30 years ago.

Today, young Chinese are freer and have more channels through which to choose their spouses. They can declare their love for someone they have longed for on TV programmes, or go to the "Bachelors' Club" to look for love.

They can also surf dating websites.

But when it comes to finding love in real life, they are finding it tough.

"We really have a more and more open and loose social environment, and there are more relationships," said 29-year-old Li Sha, an editor with a local publishing house.

"But in fact, we don't have much time to date as everybody shoulders great pressure arising from work and everyday life."

Li added that the point isn't just to tie the knot.

"What is more, I don't want to just find somebody and get married," Li said. "I hope to find someone who sees eye to eye with me in everything we do."

The increasing number of unmarried people of traditional marrying age has aroused widespread concern in China.

A survey conducted by the Social Investigation Centre of the China Youth Daily showed that 58.6 per cent of respondents said that having few opportunities to make friends is the main reason why they and their friends remain single.

About 45.1 per cent of respondents said high expectations are to blame, and another 27.1 per cent said they are too busy with work and don't have time to make friends.

A census shows that there are more than one million single people aged about 30 in Beijing and Shanghai, two major cities of China.

Yang Xiong, who has studied the changes in the criteria that people use to choose spouses over the past 25 years, said that people today think a lot more about financial power when choosing spouses.

In terms of the significance of factors including schooling, stature and family background that people use to evaluate candidate spouses, the financial power of a person is the sole factor that has seen a surge in importance in the past 25 years, Yang said.

The fact that many people face difficulties finding spouses reflects changes in society, said sociologist Wu Qinghua.

Wu said the characteristics of modern society are emerging in big cities like Beijing and Shanghai, which, for example, are witnessing more minute divisions of specialization. Consequently, people are more restricted by their specialities to certain human relations.

It seems that people know more people today, but are close to very few, Wu said.

Consequently, many people are compelled to choose spouses through arranged meetings or through matchmaker agencies.

Some parents even help seek the right person for their son or daughter.

Anxious parents exchanging information about their single children have become common scenarios in Beijing parks like Zhongshan and Zizhuyuan.

The Marriage Consultation Centre of the Beijing Municipal Women's Federation hosted a special gathering in August this year. The event attracted more than 700 parents eager to find spouses for their children.

Online love affairs, which used to be frowned upon years ago, are now favoured by more and more young people.

A survey of the online lives of Guangzhou youth showed that 15.6 per cent of respondents felt that online love was acceptable.

Yet some people choose to remain single.

University teacher Sha Qing, 37, said that he feels it is hard to get along with another person in marriage.

"If a person has to change his or her own way to suit another one, their love will be greatly debased," he said.

"Anyway, people now can choose whatever kind of life they like."

Source: China Daily 12/07/2005 page14